Congratulations, you've rejected the political duopoly and refused to be a pawn in the antiquated two-party system.
It's a big step in a young person's life to cast off the shackles of political isolation, refusing to be a democrat or a republican. It has its rewards (I don't know what they are, but I'm sure they exist), but expressing your newfound political conviction is no easy task.
If your folks are staunch liberals or conservatives, confessing your discovery will be as challenging as a catholic schoolgirl telling her parents that's she pregnant. They will be shocked and appalled, but with these tips, you can lessen the blow and hope that one day--on your 43rd birthday--they will finally accept you for who you are.
First, you'll want to cook your parents a nice meal. It's an age-old business tactic to offer potential clients a big meal before pitching their ideas. Once a person is happy and docile from their savory meal, they are much more likely to be receptive.
Smile and explain that you have something significant to tell them. The more you treat the situation negatively, the more they will perceive it negatively. Lie, and tell them that you have good news.
Once they are stuffed and approaching the sedation of a food coma, prepare to launch your attack.
Start by saying that you love them and that their love is appreciated. Express gratitude for their years of honorable and selfless service. This won't be the first (or last) time you've disappointed them, but if they feel appreciated, they might not throw you out into the cold just yet.
Now that they're prepared for some exciting news, and are receptive from the food coma, lay it on them.
"Mom, dad, I've given this a lot of thought, and I've made a decision that I hope you can understand. I'm a libertarian."
Try not to look them in the face at this point. The level of dissatisfaction on their faces may be traumatizing for some. Allow them a chance to regain their false composure.
They will try to negotiate and reason with you. They may even declare that you're too young to make these decisions. But assure them you're beyond reason and that your decision is final.
Hopefully, they will respect your candor and confidence and give you a big hug. They probably won't, but doing it this way is your best hope of one day having somewhere to dump your kids while you're partying in Fiji with a bunch of other cool libertarians.
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